Will Anal Sex Cause Problems in the Future?

Vicky asks:

Dear Amy,

I am a 25-year-old married man. I want to ask you is non-vaginal sex safe for my wife, or can it create some trouble for her in the future? Because during sex she said that it is very painful for her. please give me the perfect advice to reduce her pain during non-vaginal sex.

Thank you. 

Dear Vicky-

I am not exactly sure what you mean by "non-vaginal" sex. I assume you are talking about anal sex. Anal sex should never feel painful for anyone involved. Anal sex requires a lot of time, communication, and lube (perhaps copious amounts of lube!). If your partner is experiencing pain at any point, you may need to slow down, add more lube, or stop what you are doing altogether.

Contrary to common belief, anal sex will not cause physical problems or permanent damage to the receiver. If fact, regular anal sex may even increase your sexual health and well-being by strengthening the PC muscles (and/or prostate in men). However, if you are having regular painful anal sex, then this certainly could lead to permanent tissue damage and/or various health problems in the future. As I said before if your partner is experiencing pain, slow down, add lube, or stop what you are doing altogether.

For more information about anal sex, check out my previous blog: Anal Sex and the G-Spot, listen to Listen to Shameless Sex Podcast's Episode #187 Anal Sex, or check out the book, Butt Seriously: The Definitive Guide to Anal Health, Pleasure, and Everything in Between.

You could also view the online class: Online Class: Anal Pleasure (and Health) 101.