Mind-blowing sex
Ready to go from good sex to absolutely mind-blowing? ✨
We've got the lowdown on unlocking that next-level pleasure. Spoiler alert: it's all about getting out of your fucking mind and into your body.
How to Go From In-Your-Head to Mind-Blown
Mind-blowing sex happens when you can surrender to the experience—which is impossible if your brain is spinning with thoughts about performance, how you look, or if you're taking too long. When you're stuck in your head, you're literally blocking the body-level surrender where true ecstasy lives.
The goal is to flip that switch.
Breathwork is Your Secret Weapon
This sounds simple, but it's the gateway to feeling what you're actually feeling.
Breathe Deeper and Fuller: Seriously, just try breathing deeper than you normally would during sex. This simple act neurologically quiets the thinking part of your brain and brings you back to your sensations.
Breathe Into Your Genitals: Imagine breathing directly into your pussy, cock, or butt. You can't actually do this, but the attention shift pulls your focus away from your worries and right into your body's pleasure centers. Pay attention to the sensations inside your body while you breathe.
Open Up from the Inside - Out
We intuitively know that an open heart feels more love and joy. The same is true for your genitals. Internalized shame, fear, or guilt can create a "somatic contraction" or "stagnant energy" in your pussy, cock, or wherever your pleasure lives, which limits how much pleasure and orgasm you can feel.
Systematically doing practices to release that fear and shame leads to an "open pussy" or "open cock". This openness is a portal to the deepest, most potent orgasms.
Commit to a Solo Pleasure Practice
How you masturbate directly translates to how you experience sex with a partner. A pleasure practice is "woke masturbation" that helps you literally create new neural pathways for better orgasms and sex.
Try dedicating 10–30 minutes once a week (even once a month is life-changing!) to a solo session. During this time, focus on:
- Adding in the breathwork.
- Releasing any stuck energy from your genitals.
- Making it about feeling your genitals, breathing deeper, and letting yourself feel whatever emotions come up.
Sloooow Down & Communicate
Many of us are conditioned to be sexual "performers," which makes us rush. Go slower, breathe, listen, and feel. Especially for folks with a pussy, getting fully turned on—where the pussy "blossoms open"—can take 20, 30, or even 40 minutes.
Focus on the Build-up: Don't just go right to the endpoint. The connection, relaxation, and safety are what matter most. A great place to start is with a vulva hug, letting your hand warm up to the skin and hanging out before any penetration.
Talk It Out: Try a simple communication tool like a "fears, desires, and loves" check-in. Spend a couple of minutes each on what you're afraid of, what you desire, and what you love about your partner. This builds the trust and connection you need to say things like, "Hey, I'm in my head right now" or "I'm gonna breathe for just a moment".
Remember, you don't need a PhD to have your mind blown—you just need a willingness to make your own rules and swap that shame for pure, unadulterated pleasure.
For more juicy tips on this hot topic, listen to Shameless Sex Podcast #444 “Mind-Blowing Sex, Every Time” with Layla Martin.